Capacity

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“but perhaps especially to the woman – a power of seeing through its own enchantments and yet not being disenchanted”  – A Grief Observed, C.S Lewis (on what love gives us)

a brilliant mind like C.S Lewis, I should be careful and honored to comment on his writings. And if I may comment, I believe that he has worded this perfectly.

To live by faith, and I don’t mean this in a preachy way. By faith I mean that in spite of all the evidence, evidence that says “No,” evidence that tells you that things are bad and “wrong”, that there is a belief that “bad” and “no” only apply to the now, and for all the now’s that it will last, but this does not mean it is the be all and end all. And this is where true strength lies.

It is easy, to just say that because of X number of evidence, one would conclude for things to be a certain way. Yes, this applies as a matter of logic and common sense. But one should remember that there are aspects of life, with Love being the obvious case, that this law cannot always be applied. Maybe it is because I believe in the existence of Love, it is why i believe that Love cannot be reduced to mere logic, commonsense, nor can it be merely a sum a evidences which exist solely in the material realm of this world. Much of Love exists in the intangible realm. All we can base Love on is the way in which it moves us, how we feel, beyond all reason and logic.

At this moment of my contemplation, I do not think Pride and Love can co-exist without tension. Pride not in the sense that I pride myself with the love I have, but pride for one’s own being. Love is selfless if anything, and Pride often leads to selfishness (though being selfish isn’t always a bad thing I have learned.)

Having the capacity to see beyond the current state of affairs, and hunkering down and holding on tight believing that bad days are bad days Period. Extended times of hardship will only always exist in the now,  but now will always pass on to has beens, and thus such are only temporary. This is faith, and beyond doubt, I know this is where strength lies.

My sister once told me, “let your feelings pass through you, like running water,” and in its passing we know we’ve gotten through.

For material things only last for as long as the material world permits them to, they hold no meaning if the perceiver does not bestow meanings upon it. Meanings exist in the realm of the intangible, and thus intangible things do exist. As such Love is one only to be perceived in its intangibility, it is not material.

Don’t deny yourself the capacity to feel.

T.

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